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From: r.woodlock@bigfoot.com <r.woodlock@bigfoot.com> Subject: Why *I* left Date: Tuesday, August 18, 1998 3:59 AMI think K.Paul Johnson has a good point. When people have asked me why I left the Faith I invariably give a different answer every time. I usually believe what I am saying to be true - so why so many answers?? (I used to think people would not think I was telling the truth about it).Religious conversion is a complex phenomenon. Initially when I left, I think it was more to do with a growing attraction to Islam than a whole series of thought out beliefs that the Baha'i Faith was not true - but since then I have read and seen much (without my previously blinding "love of Baha'i" spectacles that filtered all things) that has confirmed my decision. I look back and see the genesis of my having left in a time period of about two years where I swayed to opposite ends of the pendulum "being a Muslim" and "being a Baha'i".The first post I wrote to soc.religion.bahai (which I desperately begged the moderators not to post - so they didn't) concerned the deletion of an unfulfilled prophecy from "Baha'u'llah and the New Era", yet all of my early newsgroup posts were full-on "Baha'i". I came >< close to going to the mosque to say shahaada in November/December 96, yet January '97 I was participating in an intensive youth teaching project.My Islamic beliefs have changed over time as well. At first I sought a simplictic answer to things, having been nurtured in the comfort of set-in-stone and infallible Baha'i beliefs, but have since grown more flexible and modernistic and am revelling in the freedom.Whereas once I used to hand out pamphlets in the street, I now feel uncomfortable when Baha'is "teach" to me. I don't want the "pat" answers, I want to turn around and ask them what they think of John Hick's pluralism!There are subjects with which I take issue with the Baha'i Faith, that never posed a problem in my mind as a Baha'i: but not believing that Baha'u'llah or the UHJ is infallible, means that I am free to question and re-mould myself and my opinions.I also believe there are many positive things about the Baha'i Faith, and I still believe I can write on "Baha'i beliefs" (eg. my most recent posts on Titles of the Manifestations), I love the freedom to be able to profit from what good exists in that religion, and throw away all the negatives. If it means I can't be a declared Baha'i - then so be it. I am at the stage where I believe tawhiidian monotheism of Islam is the most perfect form of religious truth, but I am open to other religions being more suitable comforts for other people. If someone *needs* to believe that Baha'u'llah is watching their every move and pushing and prodding them in a divinely ordained direction: then that is their choice. I don't think the idea that God is an Unknowable Essence that I must approach through a human being (Baha'u'llah) is a particularly useful theology to me, but that is my current state of religious evolution.Oh well, just some thoughts I guess, Regards MaryamIn article <35d85986.0@vlinsvr>, pjohnson@vlinsvr.vsla.edu (K. Paul Johnson) wrote: > Seeing an exchange about the honesty and reliability of an > ex-Baha'i's story of "why I left" inspires some comments. There > are so many ways to parse the question "Why did you leave?" that > I think a couple deserve mention. First would be "What were your > conscious thoughts at the time you chose to withdraw concerning > the reasons for doing so?" Another would be "What reactions were > going on unconsciously at the time that you can now look back on > and recognize as motivating factors?" In my own case, the > answers to these two questions would be quite different. First > would be that the claims of the Bab and Baha'u'llah about > their own status and their place in history no longer were > persuasive to me. Second would involve so many aspects of being > turned off by dogmatism, implausible readings of history, > totalitarian hopes for the future, etc. etc., that it took me > years to realize all the factors involved. > > I'd think that at this stage Tim might be learning more of those > second-order motivating factors, since it takes a long while to > process such things. > Homepage |